Wedding Celebrations

Weddings today are two day affairs and in this mad world of rush, when even the bride and groom are in a rush and relatives all want just the barest minimum intrusion into their private world of work and home to attend weddings, weddings at Dhamayanthi house were celebrations for over a month. I remember the massive Bhavani carpet, a green affair, rolled out to cover the entire hall and the whitle bundles of kaari material put out for use as spreads, mats, etc. The entire house seemed to be filled with the fragrance of flowers as mallipoo was strung with thick strings or packed into tight strings with a needle for use in the bride's decoration. Lemon juice was always flowing from pitchers, and fragrantly spiced with cardomom and sugar. (There were no colas and fantas then). Betel leaves, betel nuts and lime paste were put out in several plates and the little ones were always waiting for an opportunity for a stolen paaku ( cows would ram their horns into our stomachs, if we ate one, cautioned elders). Buying and trying out dressess custom tailored for us was another exciting activity at these weddings.

The moment a wedding was fixed, there'd be coming and goings on endlessly as moms, aunts, uncles and cousins met and departed. I think my memories of Siva maam's wedding demand  attention because that was the most memorable wedding I have ever attended with cousins at aaya's house. While elders were making preparations to identify a suitable match for maama, it so happened that we were having our holidays and so the entire group was there having a summer vacation of the best kind.We noticed the busy activities of elders going to the temple to have a look at the girl and finalising the match with maama's concurrence. But, all this was just a part of the elders' world and we did not become a part of it, till we were allowed to go to the girl's house to give our acceptance to the match. I think the elders meant to humour us, but we took it on ourselves as a sacred duty. 

We visited Ilaveni maami's house, were welcomed as a battalion ( what a sight we must have been, as the entire lot marched into the house). There we were served sandhavai, steamed rice strings, with the usual coconut scrapings, sugar, jaggery syrup and some kuruma. We came back owing allegiance to the new maami who looked beautiful, slim, fair and was always smiling. 

Our feedback was important and everything was going on well, till one of the boys, Parthi or Hari, I don't remember which, remarked "They served us glucose powder ( referring to the powdered sugar served with the sandhavai"). That remains a joke till today. Since we were very happy with the match, we decided to do something to entertain wedding guests during the wedding. This idea was hatched by Chandra Maama and Bharathi Chitappa, who probably thought that the elders would be happy to see us only during mealtimes. 

We called for meetings with the junior kids and decided on a few items to entertain guests. Ah, what a time it turned out to be. Hari and Parthi were busy prepapring for a dance, of a' Mala, mala, marudhamali' type of those days. Geeta and Mythili, over their eternal quarrels and hair-pulling fights, were unable to decide whether to join the older or younger group. Devanthi and I prepared two or three skits, all written and directed bys us. Invitations were prepared and one evening, all the elders were invited for the show on the day preceding the engagement, I think. If my memory serves right, maami was invited and I suppose, inadvertently, we gave maama and maami, a morning of stolen glances and smiles. 

The morning was a hectic one, as we went hunting for costumes and dressed up as dancers, peasants, idiots, servants, bosses and extras. The small audience gathered mid morn and sat through our performances. Hari and Parthi's cabaret number was the most enjoyed. A skit about an idiot servant, a director wanting a scene being done in different emotions, radhai and krishna dance, quizzes and invitations to the audience to clap were the highlights of our show. 

There is still a glow when I recall those moments, not very clearly, ofcourse, but the feeling still remains, as intense today, as it was then. The joy of belonging, of a sense of appreciation, of a sense of doing something for our beloved family members, the feeling of closeness it engendered in us, all these are precious to all of us who were there that day. That is perhaps one of the reasons why Ilaveni maami is looked upon with an extra touch of fondness...for the 'glucose', for the joy she brought in and for understanding our childish pranks.